Say what you like about Hitchcock, the dude knew his women! He surrounded himself with some world-class hotties – a fine stable of prime wool for himself, Cary Grant and Jimmy Stewart to pick from. He had game before The Game even had game.
Let’s scope out The Five Hottest Hitchcock Blondes, bro.
5. Janet Leigh
A good girl gone bad, Janet Leigh turned heads in Psycho. Not just good-looking, she knew how to jack that paper, too. Leigh made film history – and erection history – with her infamous shower scene. Word has it that if you freeze frame and look carefully, you can totally spot nips.
4. Eva Marie Saint.
This naughty nymph from Newark is the best thing to come out of Jersey since my unlicensed Viagra shipments (hey-o!). She plays Cary Grant like a pro before inviting him back to her train car for a little North-on-Northwest action. But Grant’s got her figured out. He’s one of the original PUAs.
3. Kim Novak
Novak doesn’t take “No” for an answer. This sultry-eyed blonde plays head games with Jimmy Stewart in Vertigo. And after listening to her throaty purr, I promise she’ll be featuring in your dreams tonight as well.
2. Ingrid Bergman
You may recognize this hottie from our earlier series, 5 Hottest Stars of Michael Curtiz Films, based on her head-turning role in Casablanca. But she also gave it up for Hitchcock in three steamy roles – a trampy trophy wife in Notorious, a lusty love doctor in Spellbound and a hellcat of a housewife in Under Capricorn. I’d always heard that Swedish chicks were less inhibited; too bad she died before we could find out.
1. Grace Kelly
Long considered the epitome of style and elegance, Grace Kelly is without a doubt the most eminently boffable Hitchcock blonde. After lighting up the screen in To Catch a Thief, Rear Window and Dial M for Murder, Grace Kelly married the Prince of Monaco. If I had my own country, I’d change the laws so I could marry a dozen women at once, then I’d marry Jessica Biel, Megan Fox, Katy Perry and Brooklyn Decker. Then I’d make it illegal for them to wear clothes. Sorry, ladies – like my boy Jeremy B. said, the law is the expression of the general will!